Hypoman's Diary/Is There Anybody Out There?

I have missed blogging.

I have missed you.

I have missed Hypoman.

What is a boy to do?

To ease back in to blogging I am going to try to keep a diary. Plain. And simple.

Today I got up, as per "normal", at 06:00. As soon as I get downstairs I have a glass of water and take 10mcg of T3 (liothyronine) sublingually.

I then pour another glass of water and sit in front of the telly with the laptop on and iPhone to hand and wait to feel even remotely human again (still waiting).

At 07:30 I take a vitamin C tablet and a B complex tablet.

I then prepare breakfast. Gluten free porridge oats with raspberry jam, English blossom honey and cinnamon. Sometimes with a milk and water mix, sometimes just water, that's how I roll. Then when porridge starts to boil I add a pinch of salt and time 5 minutes from this point, constantly stirring until done.

I then drink another glass of water whilst making my first decaf mug of tea of the day. Yorkshire Tea Decaf is best.

I drink three more mugs of tea.

At some point I remember that I forgot to have my probiotic drink (irony).

At midday I have a vitamin C tablet and a B12 lozenge.

I then prepare lunch. Today Spanish omelette.

The perfect Spanish omelette.

After washing up and clearing away I drink another mug of tea. In front of the telly and laptop with my iPhone by my side. Waiting for other peoples lives to happen.

All the time, at the back of my mind, I am thinking THYROID. Adrenal insufficiency. The need to order another 24 hour saliva test as I had the last one done in August 2012.

Full iron panel results. I had blood taken the week before last and collected the results last week. Still haven't got round to posting them on a internet forum I trust for interpretation.

Vitamin B12. I had blood taken for many tests the week before last. My B12 is comfortably mid-range for a "normal" person. I am not "normal". I have thyroid disease. Therefore my B12 needs to be near the top of the range. Have started supplementation just yesterday. Will speak to my doctor about it... soon.

I have called my doctors surgery to see if my vitamin D test result is in. It is. Normal, no action required. They have printed it off and I will collect it when I pick up my repeat prescription for T3 which I ordered in the same phone call. Good aren't I?

I need to go through all the results from this latest raft of blood tests and try to get my brain fog addled mind around them and plan a way ahead.

This is only my second day on 10mcg T3 and the vitamin C/B complex/B12 supplementation. I made the decision to start again from scratch and take it slowly. Really slowly. I have the patience. I have done it before. But this time, REALLY SLOWLY.

A fact that I can support with blood test results, symptoms and research. My body does not convert T4 into T3 very well. In fact my body converts T4 into the inactive T3 hormone RT3 (Reverse T3). This pools in my bloodstream and leaves me feeling really shitty. Awful. Earlier this year I went through the painstaking, and not as straightforward as I would have liked, process of RT3 clearance. To do this I was on T3 only medication. I'll cover this in much more detail at a later date, I hope.

The clearance process left me feeling better but not close to being well. I was even able to go out for walks, more about this again later, I hope.

When T3 only wasn't the answer I made the big decision to source NDT (natural desiccated thyroid) from an online pharmacy. The process of ordering and receiving this medication went smoothly. Almost too smoothly. I am not complaining. I NEVER complain.

But I fucked up.

But I learnt a lesson.

After getting to 4 grains of NDT a day I was feeling really poorly. After 20+ weeks of clearing RT3 I had only gone and inadvertently provided my body with T4 with which to immediately, greedily convert to RT3. So after a month or so I decided to stop the NDT and switch over gradually to a T3 only regime once again.

I was demoralised.

I am still demoralised.

I was frustrated.

I am still frustrated.

I will always be frustrated.

That's another story.

I gradually built back up to 70mcg T3 per day. But I wasn't happy. I needed to take action. I needed to start all over again. My body was telling me this. Shouting.

So I slowly weened myself off the T3 until I was on no medication at all. This coincided with me being on no supplements as I had stopped taking them ahead of the blood tests outlined above.

I lasted a week with nothing.

Yesterday I got back on my bike/back in the saddle.

Got my game face back on.

If I can just get one thing straight in my head each day I will be happy with my progress. I will try. I will.

I saw a blog post from a thyroid hero of mine, Paul Robinson, author of the excellent book Recovering With T3. The blog post was about explaining why so many thyroid patients feel the therapeutic benefit in the immediate aftermath of a medication dosage change only for this to only be a cruel fleeting glimpse of what could be.

This part of my puzzle suddenly made sense.

It was my life for 7+ years.

It rang a bell.

LOUDLY.

My ears are still ringing.

Effect of TSH on Conversion of T4 to T3

It has occurred to me that this blog post could be a result of just such a phenomenom.

Later today I will be having a simple salad for tea. Lettuce, tomato, cucumber, celery with cheese and a little dressing. Here's one I made earlier...

This evening over a few more mugs of tea I will watch some telly/listen to some music all the while having a dialogue of sorts with the voice in my head. My inner voice.

At 19:00 I will have a vitamin C tablet and a B complex tablet.

Then I will prepare myself mentally to do it all again tomorrow.

You still with me?

You still interested in walking my journey through life with me?

I missed blogging.

I missed you.

I am Hypoman.

Remember, for as long as we have hope we have a chance.